Removing the C-word from your vocabulary


You can do anything you want.

Short of ceasing to breathe, eat or drink, you can take just about any course of action you desire and still wake up a living human being tomorrow.

Nothing is physically forcing you to engage in an activity in which you’d rather not be engaged.

So “I can’t”? Doesn’t really exist.

Which is why when I hear “you can’t” (from someone else, or from my own mind), I get pretty riled up.

Because, guys? It all comes down to priorities.

“Oh, you can’t eat this candy bar. It’s got milk in it.”

Um, no. I choose not to eat that candy bar because a) my body deserves to be fed real food, not something from a factory line, and b) the way milk is produced is gross + depressing + all-around bad karma generating.

“Ugh, I just want to bask in this patch of sunlight on my bed a little longer, but I can’t because I have to go to work.”

Correction: I just want to bask in this patch of sunlight on my bed a little longer, but I choose to go to work to a) maintain my independence (because being independent rules) and b) save for fun secret future endeavors.

“I can’t take one more minute of this relationship. I just can’t handle the emotional drain/responsibility/time suck.”

Well, actually: this relationship is severely detracting from my quality of life. I can either choose to keep it going, or I can reflect on the gentlest way to change/end it for the sake of my sanity and happiness.”


It’s Chinese New Year over here, y’all. And in the vaguely-related spirit of new beginnings, I’m declaring this week Official Can’t-Free Week. This week, there are no “can’t”s. There are no “have to”s.

There are only “I choose to”s, “I want to”s and “I will”s.

What will you choose to do this week? And why are you making that choice?

  • Rheel Daze

    Haha! I thought we were talking about an entirely different C-word when I first saw the title. On another note, I just committed to quitting sugar and I’m having to really focus on all of the things I CAN have in my new endeavor and not the things I CAN’T. Like better skin, sleep, health and lots of rice chips and french fries! Well, I’ll go east on the fries but it’s so important to remain optimistic. Great examples of how to flip your “can’t” switch too.

    • Claire (Eat Well. Party Hard.)

      Baaahaha, glad my vulgar humor translated correctly.

      I just read your post about committing to quitting sugar, and damn, woman, SO MUCH RESPECT. I have many many thoughts buzzing around in my head about this. How are you feeling so far? Empowered? Terrified? Cranky and annoyed?

  • Rheel Daze

    Hey Claire! I only just saw this response because I was kind of feeling all of those things and I figured I would check in with you for some inspiration. I love the series you’re doing up top! Your installments are such a fantastic resource and free! Anyway, about the sugar. I’ve been off it five whole weeks now. I had three days where I slipped but no diet sodas at all and for the most part I’ve been really healthy but I’m getting really bored of eating the same things over and over again. Also, you CANNOT eat whatever you want so long as it doesn’t have sugar in it and expect to lose weight like I was told. In fact, the weight is coming off slower than it ever has but I’m in the gym a lot more so maybe it’s muscle, who knows? Overall I’m glad I’m doing this but I still have cravings and think about food constantly. The goal is to get to a point where eating isn’t something I’m committing tons of thought to and is just something that happens without a big fuss surrounding it but I realize that will most likely take some time. I would love to hear your thoughts on the no sugar plan. Maybe a post about it? Thanks for all your hard work delivering the meal planning posts! Cheers!

    • Claire (Eat Well. Party Hard.)

      First, five whole weeks?! Uuuuh, HUGE congrats on that, and on getting to the gym more regularly than before. That all had/has to take some serious self-discipline/mental ass-kicking.

      On the cravings, thinking about food constantly and getting tired of eating the same things–what are you eating lately? Is there a typical pattern your meals follow, are you using a plan laid out exactly in the no-sugar book, etc? I’d love to know more about those challenges as they apply to you individually to provide some more specific strategy (and less “it’s all gonna be okay! bullshit). We can continue the convo here, or you’re free to email me (